Behind the "MAGIC" of Human Transformation

I may be unusual in this regard, but in my view, getting people truly well is a transformative process. Nobody can accomplish authentic growth, healing and change, unless they’re willing to alter deeply entrenched, self-defeating patterns of behavior and thought. There are no exceptions.

Most addicts never recover, they just switch addictions. They may routinely revisit “addiction recovery facilities” when they fall off the wagon due to brain chemistry imbalances, which were never addressed during their stays. There’s an abhorrent lack of responsible assessment and medical intervention by a qualified psychiatrist, which every facility should have on staff. Sadly, the return rate for people with substance abuse issues to “clinics” is a cash cow for these types of facilities, and from where I’m sitting, change is not in our foreseeable future.

Addiction of ANY type is driven by one’s need to disconnect from difficult emotions. This disconnect or dissociation from feelings, is what kept many of us alive as we struggled emotionally, as children. We couldn't understand our pain when we were little, so we went up into our head to try and figure out why we were hurting (and most of us still do).

This spawned in us a reflex of mentally analyzing our pain, rather than having to endure it in the body. This practice effectively distracted us from whatever discomfort we physically experienced inside ourselves, and thus, became a reliable strategy to deal with sensations like pain, longing for love, or emptiness, to name a few.

I think it was in my late 20’s when I understood I had to change some long-standing patterns of thought and behavior, or I’d likely circle the drain for many years to come. I tried a number of interventions that I thought might work for me, and some failed. The ones that started bringing about positive changes I could feel, I implemented daily.

My life ‘magically’ changed as a direct result of using what I fondly refer to today, as my “power tools.” I could not have achieved what I have nor become who I am, had I not invented these tools for myself, and used them diligently until they became automatic, reflexive habits.

In the years I’ve inhabited the home I bought 10 years ago, there have been countless little projects I could never have accomplished, without the help of the power tools I purchased over the past decade or so. Precisely the same principle applies, when we finally decide to help ourselves accomplish inner projects!

The issues we either don’t have the strength to conquer under our own steam, require a bit of extra help~ but many of us grew up not being able to rely on or trust others with our care. This early conditioning can stop us from gifting ourselves what we need to ‘get the job done,’ in terms of bringing about permanent resolution and healing for ourselves. Psychotherapy can be useful under certain circumstances, but it hasn’t healed the core pain and shame in us that perpetuates self-flagellation and poor self-worth, and blocks our ability to attain contentment and joy.

I am NOT suggesting that cognitive behavioral therapy is the answer. I think of CBT as a kind of ‘shorthand treatment’ for very young souls who are too underdeveloped to absorb and integrate abstract concepts and in-depth insights. This segment of the population has great difficulty connecting the dots or assembling their inner puzzle pieces into a cohesive, rational, complete picture that makes any real sense to them.

I’m writing about bright individuals who’ve become masterful at beating themselves to a bloody pulp 24/7 since the tender age of 2, due to the psychological and emotional abuses they suffered at the hands of their parental units, who were not emotionally equipped to effectively love a child (any child). These wounds to one’s early sense of Self are maintained lifelong by millions, if not resolved by a caring professional who understands them intimately, and knows precisely how to mend the scars that inevitably remain.

If you can help people change their critical, shaming inner voice, you can get them WELL~ but they can’t do this entirely on their own. They need appropriately used power tools supplied by a nurturing, sometimes stern guide who’ll prevent them from lapsing into reflexive, self-destructive inner-narratives, which have enveloped them in anguish.

Conservatively, 80% of the world’s depression is solely due to people being critical and hard on themselves. NO amount of antidepressant therapy is effective against one’s inner demons. It’s literally like drinking highly-toxic poison everyday, while eating a fairly healthy diet. The poison’s gonna win this war over your physical health, every single time.

If this article has spoken to you, if you resonate with it, please consider sending it to a friend or family member. Thank you!