Just a Facebook post from way back in June, 2021.

I felt it was worth reviving, and maybe you will, too!

Sometimes you find your niche, and sometimes your niche finds You (as was the case for me). I wasn't one of those kids who knew what she wanted to be when she grew up. My only concern was to merely survive.

I think this is true for a lot of people who had unstable, fucked-up childhoods. It goes without saying. The problem with this orientation, is that we tend to never think beyond survival, because it's not in our wheelhouse or frame of reference, to even consider thriving.

One critical element I think is essential for anyone hoping to thrive or at least survive more effectively, is discerning your target audience. This principle holds true whether you're on a dating app, social media, or have a business or career venture you'd like to get off the ground. In short, you HAVE to know who you're marketing to, and whether Their agenda matches up with Yours.

When you've been mostly dissociated from your feelings since you were very young, because it was too painful as a kid to accommodate em, your extra-sensory aspects can't work for you, in terms of discerning who might be receptive to your personal OR professional outreaches. This leaves you with a tremendous disadvantage, in terms of being successful at either!

Our instincts and intuition are our built-in survival guide. When they're functioning for us, we are alerted to danger, both in personal and professional realms. If we've trained ourselves not to FEEL a litany of dangerous, painful emotions since we were toddlers, our inner GPS is disabled. It cannot guide us toward effective choices or solutions~ and when it TRIES to, we doubt and distrust it.

Today's post is motivated by the vast numbers of males on Facebook who ONLY look at my photo in a "friend suggestion" and look no further, to determine if MY values, agenda and priorities match theirs, before they hit that 'send' button. They then, feel disappointment and/or anger, when I don't hit the ball they've lopped over to me, back across the net.

I use Facebook primarily to expose people to utterly priceless, highly educational and healing materials on my website. You might say, my initial intentions when I opened this account 2.5 years ago, were for marketing purposes.

I've always been an educator at heart. I never cared if ya contacted me for HELP or not~ I just wanted to give you an ADVANTAGE in context of understanding others AND yourself, as each pertained to life and love.

For the past 30 years, when I've handed my business card to someone, it's for the SOLE purpose of illuminating them as to why they've struggled in this lifetime~ and how they can go about healing those issues. My online materials have educated and assisted people in recovering from their pain since 2004, when my website was first erected.

My BPD articles were kind of a fluke. NEVER did I even suspect I'd write more than one article on Borderline Personality Disorder, yet my BLACKMAILED INTO FATHERHOOD piece got such astounding responses, I was compelled to write more~ which resulted in 24 more articles which delved into the intricacies of that disorder, and how it plays out in romantic relationships.

Suffice it to say, a niche was born that catapulted me into being an international presence. I'm grateful for this, but it was never actually part of my plan. In truth, I HAD no plan. I merely wanted to educate reasonably literate folks on this planet, emotionally.

My "target audience" grew to be anyone who has wrestled with frustration, pain and anger in relation to being with someone they have loved. As it turns out, far too many people grew up thinking these uncomfortable feelings were just part of "NORMAL" loving, and to be expected.

My written materials on the topic of BPD don't just cast dispersions on folks who abusively turn your world upside-down and inside-out, they force you to look at YOUR unresolved issues, which led you into the arms of someone who's tormenting, in the first place!

THIS is what sets my articles apart from anything else you can read on the internet, or in books written on this topic. My acute understanding of human nature (which is innate in this lifetime) is what helps you see the Bigger Picture of WHY you're in such excruciating pain from this type of relationship experience, and what you can do to actually recover and REBUILD yourself in the aftermath of it.

A large part of BPD relationship breakup pain, is the confusion it leaves us in. This is what forces us to compulsively obsess about our ex, and what we might have done "differently or better" to have averted this agonizing outcome!

This obsession and the endless mental masturbation you can't help doing in reference to it, is merely a leftover from your early childhood yearning and longing for maternal attention, warmth and adoration. You've simply transferred all that pain onto each new partner you bond with, because they're cut from the same cloth as a mother who began failing you, as soon as you left her womb.

On this beautiful day (depending on where in the world you reside), I want you to fully understand that the pain and torment you're feeling right now, does not have to be permanent~ and if you think it will be, you oughta give me a call, so I can (at least) set ya straight on that. (323) 936-3637