Understanding BPD~ it's NOT rocket science, though it seems that way to most.
People have always asked, "How do you KNOW so much about Borderlines?!" I worked hard at gaining an intimate understanding of my OWN human nature, over the course of several decades. In the process, understanding others felt immediately familiar, clear to me and automatic.
I worked at overcoming my fears surrounding attachment left over from early childhood. A considerable amount of reframing those experiences by comprehending how they'd left me with deficits and insecurities, and growing newfound self-worth, was a much-needed part of my healing and development.
I am not invincible. Nobody is. As human beings, we're not designed to be invulnerable~ but we CAN become genuinely empowered with the right type of guidance.
Never trust someone with your care who hasn't first, been there themselves, and overcome the type of obstacles you're facing. I had a wonderful therapist during my school years, but outgrew him. His body weight fluctuated significantly. Having been a compulsive eater for decades, I understood very intimately, what that meant.
He wasn't emotionally equipped to take me where I knew I wanted to go. It should also be said, that as an MFT intern back then, I was doing much deeper work with My clients than he was able to do with me. That's okay, he'd been an helpful part of my evolution.
What's important here, is that no matter how strong you THINK you've become, it's still true that every living, breathing creature is vulnerable or fragile at times. This fragility does NOT define us, it merely represents a spoke or two in our wagon wheel.
These parts of us remind us to be careful and cautious. Without them, we can get seriously hurt, thru carelessness or false ego and pride. These aspects are indicative of bravado and grandiosity~ which are dimensions of Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
Truly powerful people respect and honor their vulnerability~ they don't despise and shame themselves for it. This is actually the aspect within them, that prevents 'em from putting themselves in harms way, so that they CAN remain healthy and intact.
Are you GETTING this??
Yes, I am getting this. Although very slowly and painfully pulling out shards of glass and shard of metal from the thousand cuts of death at the hands of a clinically diagnosed Cluster B - BPD - PTSD - ASPD - Covert / Malignant NPD - DID - MPD and much much more.
20 years of marriage without one I’ll moment until she had a nervous breakdown in 2012. She was having flashbacks, vivid dreams, all from her past and the bomb essentially went off on me. All due to memories and experiences from her childhood which she later wrote into a document for therapy. From that day forward the circus can to town and so did her family and flying monkeys.
On 5.26.2022 she split personalities during a couples therapy session. That was the day I went from being the most loving, caring, husband to the most hated man in the planet. Discarded, abandoned, betrayed, triangulated, and humiliated.
The most excruciatingly painful thing I have ever experienced. I’ve been feeling it, healing it, and rebuilding it as best as I can without professional help. I was certainly emotionally, mentally, verbally, physically, and financially abused and destroyed.
I found your videos and writings about one year ago and you have been very helpful in my educational process. Not being able to comment or respond on other platforms, I want to let you know how much I appreciate your contributions to this personality disorder in its entirety. I have learned a lot and will continue doing so. Thank you.
Have a blessed day.
Sincerely,
CR