Why a Borderline Personality Disordered lover leaves us perplexed and obsessed.

Talk is cheap. This saying accurately describes how a borderline disordered individual interacts with you. They talk the talk, but they never walk it.

Thousands of men have asked me why their ex’s words never matched their actions. The following should help ease your confusion~ but in the meantime, please try to accept that obsessional thinking is driven by what we can’t seem to make sense of, and it’s the very basis of our struggle to let go of a toxic relationship, and MOVE ON.

A Borderline will SAY things to you which make you feel loved and emotionally secure in your relationship with 'em, but you can never count on what they're saying as true. This creates tormenting confusion and frustration for you, so here's some clarity:

You cannot TRUST that whatever a Borderline tells you, is factual or valid! Most are pathological liars, and the few who aren't, will still embellish or augment the truth to make their narrative sound plausible, and have you see them in a positive light.

A Borderline may say things like, "I never before You considered marrying or having children with anyone," yet they're maintaining emotional connections and contact with all their ex boyfriends or girlfriends, and your meals together are interrupted by routine calls and text messages from those people!

You don't know what to believe, because when your BPD lover looks soulfully into your eyes and makes you feel like the luckiest man or woman on the planet, it's merely words crafted IN THE MOMENT that have no meaning or emotional responsibility attached to them.

Poor impulse control is part of what drives their irrepressible verbal conveyances, because just like a very young child who has not acquired a sense of 'cause and effect,' your BPD lover never considers the importance of backing up their WORDS to you, with congruent behaviors!

If you have a even a modicum of character and integrity, YOU would never behave this way, even if there were a gun to your head~ but it's standard practice, for a person with Borderline Personality Disorder, and it comes as naturally to 'em as breathing.

Lack of empathy prevents a Borderline from even considering the potential of, "what if someone did this to ME?" It literally never enters their mind.

If one day, they hook up with someone as emotionally undercooked as they, and it's their turn to be on the receiving end of these emotional manipulations, they experience pure OUTRAGE~ but fail to recognize that this is the shit they've been pulling on everyone else they've ever gotten close to!

Ah, it's so easy to forgive a child for not knowing better~ but when that child is encased in an adult body and will do virtually ANYTHING to survive, their concern is never for Your survival or well-being~ only for their own.

A Borderline will beg, borrow or steal to survive. They'll even MURDER in a fit of rage, to keep all threats to them at bay. Many are living life-sentences behind bars, for a crime of passion that ended an innocent life. Some women with BPD have murdered their own children, in effort keep a disgruntled lover around.

A Borderline’s lack of boundaries drives 'love-bombing' behaviors at the start of your romance, and because your lover’s desperate little child's heart has waited so very long to FEEL LOVED, you can't resist taking that ride with ‘em~ even if your gut instincts are telling ya this glorious sense of rapture can't possibly last.

You tell yourself at these times, "it's worth the risk" ~but in the final analysis, IS IT?? Believe it or not, there's an upside to all this, because just as you cannot believe anything "good" your BPD lover says about you, ya really can't believe and take to heart all the BAD stuff they heap on you when they're upset, either!